Here are my Week 15 NFL picks against the spread, for which I have zero feelings of accuracy.
It's hard to get up for the NFL today. I've been knocked out of my fantasy playoffs (the timely match up against Jamaal Charles, Adrian Peterson, Knowshon Moreno, Mike Wallace and Roddy White hurt a little bit), the Lions are playing for pride and draft positioning and, worst of all, I have to attend a funeral today. Throw in what happened in Connecticut on Friday and it feels like sports should take a seat in the trunk today. Or maybe it'll be a good escape. I don't think there's a wrong answer.
The one thing keeping me motivated to put out my picks is the potential glory of finishing first in a pick 'em league of over 6,000 people, in which I'm currently in third place. Feelings are weird this weekend, though - I have no confidence in my picks and it's quite possible I wind up with a week much worse than last, which was my worst this season at 8-8. I start this week 0-1 after Philly turned the ball over four times in five plays on Thursday night and then got a "disconcerting" unsportsmanlike penalty that cost me the cover (Cinci scored a touchdown instead of kicking a field goal and lost by 21).
Here are the rest of my Week 15 picks:
FALCONS (-2.5) over Giants
This line means the Falcons will score more than 2 points, right?
Packers (-2.5) over BEARS
Jay Cutler's brain should be very concerned about Clay Matthews' return, muscles.
BROWNS (-1.5) over Redskins
Sorry, Kirk Cousins.
Vikings (+3.5) over RAMS
I'll call him AP if I want to. To me, it stands for Aberrational Person.
DOLPHINS (-7.5) over Jaguars
Puke GIF Game of the Week (without the GIF)
Colts (+9.5) over TEXANS
The Texans' defense is GREAT, except when they play good offenses.
CHARGERS (-3.5) over Panthers
Norv Turner's farewell tour improves to a resounding 2-0.
BILLS (+4.5) over Seahawks
Sometimes it's harder to come back from a 58-0 win than it is a 58-0 loss.
COWBOYS (-0.5) over Steelers
Everything is measured by the length of one of Dez Bryant's fingers this year.
RAIDERS (-3.5) over Chiefs
Janikowski field goals are worth 3.5 points.
49ers (+6.5) over PATRIOTS
Wintery mix of Colin Kaepernick and Alex Smith.
TITANS (-2.5) over Jets
Let's put those "Jets could still make the playoffs" stories to rest.
TEASERS (+14 points):
EAGLES (+18) over Bengals
SAINTS (+10.5) over Bucs
Fool me once, shame on Drew Brees. Fool me twice, well, uh, you're not going to fool me again.
RAVENS (+16.5) over Broncos
Joe Flacco wins a game and thinks he's elite again. It's so adorbs.
Lions (+8.5) over CARDINALS
Last week: 8-8