It's the holidays, so I'm going to make these babies quick. I'm in second place in my pick 'em league and started the week off 1-0 after winning Saturday's Monday Night Football game.

Falcons (-3.5) over LIONS

Fans are openly cheering for the Lions to lose games so they can have a better draft pick, but at the same time they are using these games to continue judging Jim Schwartz. That doesn't seem fair, but some fans are stupid.

PACKERS (-12.5) over Titans

CJ2K is frazzled about the company in the CJ2K nickname department, or maybe he's still gassed after that impressive 94-yard touchdown run last week.

Colts (-5.5) over CHIEFS

Jamaal Charles would start to go off after I lose in my fantasy playoffs.

Bills (+4.5) over DOLPHINS

Dolla, dolla.

Redskins (-4.5) over EAGLES

If the Eagles cover this, I'm going to snap into a slim jim on the NFL's weirdness. Or I'm going to adamantly refuse to see the movie Silver Linings.

BUCCANEERS (-3.5) over Rams

Believe it or not, this officially knocks the Rams out of playoff contention.

Raiders (+7.5) over PANTHERS

Raiders keep it within a touchdown.

Patriots (-14.5) over JAGUARS

They can't wait for Tim Tebow to show up!

Chargers (+2.5) over JETS

Unless Tebow does something weird on the eve of Christmas Eve.

Browns (+13.5) over BRONCOS

Broncos win a tough one, imagine that.

Bears (-4.5) over CARDINALS

A defense that can actually take advantage of the Cardinals' horrible offense. Plus, Jay Cutler isn't as generous as Matthew Stafford.

RAVENS (+1.5) over Giants

I'm starting to worry about Tom Coughlin's face.

TEASERS (+14 points)

Saints (+16.5) over COWBOYS

Good for the Saints for overcoming the offseason scandal distractions to possibly finish .500 this year. It's peculiar how talent trumps head coaching.

Bengals (+18) over STEELERS

One day, AJ Green might be half as good as Calvin Johnson and he'll be the best wide receiver in the NFL.

Vikings (+21) over TEXANS

Be silly, Adrian Peterson.

SEAHAWKS (+15) over 49ers

I'm strangely aroused for this festivus of kickers.

Last WEEK: 9-7

SEASON: 144-78-2